Things I learned from “Beyonce: Life is but a dream”

Everyone has a pick me up movie right? A movie that cures those rainy day blues or makes you feel motivated to face an upcoming challenge. I have fallen in love with Beyoncé’s HBO documentary because it does just that for me. She faces her own demons, struggles and challenges just as we do however the perspective she gains and shares are applicable to everyday life. I am a firm believer that you can learn from the mistakes of others and when I watch this video I am reminded to do just that.

I’ve put down some of my favorite quotes from her and why I find them valuable to my everyday life or why I connect with them so well.

“I’m still trying to learn that I don’t have kill myself, and be so hard on myself and be so critical… I can smell the roses.”

As great as success can be, it also brings about a lot of pressure. It’s so stressful trying to keep up with your past wins and roles. People start to expect so much from you that you feel like you can’t keep up and that failure is imminent. It’s too stressful… I think sometimes we forget that success/failure are personal perspectives and only we decide which category our daily battles fall into. Being unable to acknowledge your goods, your positives and your bright spots is just draining. It’s like you can’t breath. You need to do things our of love and passion and not out of fear of hurting someone or letting someone down. You have to be you.

“I don’t want to never be satisfied, I don’t think that’s a healthy way to live.”

I have been fortunate enough to be extremely successful in sport, work and life however I have often found myself trying to upgrade or enhance something. It used to be rare for me to relish a podium finish. I would wonder, why not first? How do I score higher? Why did I take that step? I should have had that! I never stepped back and said, wow, 5th in the WORLD! Or yes, an international medal. I didn’t take time to be satisfied with the overall picture. It didn’t make me motivated, it made feel like I failed.

In relationships, I feel people are just always looking to upgrade. It’s like men have become the new accessory and you have to bump up to the new model instead of just acknowledging that what you have is great and that it makes you happy. You try to move too fast because you chase what society perceives as the “perfect” relationship or age for marriage. All your doing is causing tension and pushing potential great people away over an insecurity. Sit back, laugh more, be with the person you can’t live without even if they aren’t what you expected, what your parents wanted or have their flaws.

“Stop pretending that I have it all together and if I’m scared be scared, allow it, release it, move on.”

This is the hardest advice to take and stick to. I am so afraid to look weak. I am usually the person people turn to when they need help, a listening ear, guidance or simply a distraction from life. I feel that sometimes people think I am immune to problems, struggles, sadness and disappointments. I am the strong one, the confident one, the one who doesn’t give up and keeps his chin up. I am the “hero”. But it’s not true. I cry. I break. I lose myself and feel lost. People assume that a smile means everything ok when sometimes it’s just the easiest way to hide everything.

“… that’s not true. All I need is not me because I can’t do it by myself.”

Superman is a fictional character. We all need help sometimes not matter how strong we are. Life is about balance and we=hen you lose your balance you need great people to help you regain it. Everyone needs support and needs to feel appreciated for their contribution. People need to be pulled out of the gutter and placed back on the right path in life. You can’t alienate the world and try to defeat it.

“There’s no drumroll or trumpet that goes off when you make the biggest decision of your life. Sometimes you don’t even know you made them.”

I think joining gymnastics is the best example of this. I joined it 26 years ago because I just loved it. I didn’t know it would turn into my life passion, my career and mold my life in so many ways. I didn’t realize it would uproot me from my family and lead me to new cities, new friends and what feels like an unlikely amount of success.

I think we make decisions daily that we don’t realize are shaping the lives we will live a decade from now and it isn’t until we look back that we realize the most successful things can be attributed to such simple thoughts. Truth is, we all know where we want to go in life and we take the steps we think we need to get there. Mist of the time though, the path we set out on changes and although we may get to where we wanted in the end, we made small decisions that made tremendous impacts and altered the route we used to get there.

Life may be but a dream, however we often don’t realize that we are setting up the kind of dream it turns out to be.

Den XO

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